Someone sent me an email a few days ago suggesting that the scribblers (the one that I'm entering for that competition) might be being used to construct a rival book or something by a 'Fake fforde'.
Now, I happened to mention it to you-know-who - just making conversation and all - and she has urgently insisted that she issue her own statement to you all. And so I (lucky me) am to be her amanuensis. And here it is.
In her own words:
Be careful. He is not... well. How could he be? If he were well he would never have abandoned me at the altar.
(Miss Havisham wishes to point out that she can write with a quill faster than i can 'tip tap'. She has also complained that the 'tip-tapping' is giving her a headache. In fact, now she has decided she will tip tap herself. Over to you MH)
(Right. That took her 20 minutes. I'll just get on with it and if I type fast enough she won't be able to insist on me putting in more of her complaints.)
(All right, I'm to say she doesn't complain - she instructs me in a helpful spirit)
He was always very… sensitive about his writing. I understand this. I too have been treated as a secondary character. Like all me he finds criticism hard. Impossible you might say. We do not wish to push him to extremes. He already has many books under his control. If angered, he could destroy them entirely.
He may also have help from others. He has some trouble in writing still, but in person... I can only say he is very persuasive.. and you do not know what
he may try and persuade you to do.
One thing: you tell me that one of our helpers feared he is using the scribblers for his book. This may be true, but the author retains control of unpublished writing. As long as everything between you is in writing, you should be safe. Do not agree to meet him. Do not use the hand-chatterer machine to speak with him. If he has your words it is possible that you may have some control over him. I need to think more on this.
I need to know what he is doing and what he is writing. There will be a clue somewhere.
But be careful. He may have help from inside. There are plenty of disgruntled characters if you know where to look. Do not speak secrets in front of open books.
If all else fails, as many of the authors of the unpublished scribblers must be in the place called Swindon on the seventh. That may be our only chance to stop him. If his book is published, it could spell the end for many.